Building or Tearing Down?

I have a Titus 2 relationship with an older woman in my church. Judy has been such an incredible blessing in my life since we started meeting last August. Her encouragement and wisdom has challenged me to be a better Christian and wife. It's refreshing to have a relationship with a more mature Christian, wife, and mother with whom I can be honest, share my dreams and goals and admit my fears and failures. She prays with me, encourages me, rejoices with me and offers advice and wisdom. I can't tell you how thankful I am for our relationship.

Currently we are reading through the book A Woman after God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George. I highly recommend it! The section we have been studying recently is about the home and how the home is the wife's domain and her responsibility. In one of the chapters, the author quotes this verse in Proverbs:

The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. Proverbs 14:1

I told Judy that I didn't think I had heard that verse before. I'm sure I've read over it at some point before in my quiet time studying Proverbs, but it never stood out to me the way it has recently. I've been thinking about this verse daily as I go about my life and frequently asking myself, "Am I building my home or tearing it down?"

Am I building my home or tearing it down with:

The words I say to my husband?
The television programs that are on in my home?
My attitude as I clean my home?
The things I do for my husband?
My priorities?
My words and actions toward guests we invite in our home?
The possessions I buy for our home?
The way I spend my time in our home?
The emphasis I place on strengthening my relationship with the Lord?
My thoughts?
The effort I put in making our home a refuge and a welcoming place?

I have found myself asking that question several times a day especially before I say something to Matt. I want to be building him up and encouraging him rather than tearing him down through complaints and nagging. It has been a good reminder to me to be more intentional in my thoughts, words and actions and to remember that in everything I do I am either building up my home or tearing it down. That can be pretty convicting at times.